Posted by: kcgadiyar | February 17, 2010

Sport (or something like it)

I have been watching the Vancouver Olympics live on ESPN over the past week, so far i have to say that i am impressed with the ESPN coverage. This gives me hope that the next time India win a medal we wont switch to the channel covering the Olympics to see a fencing bout.

While i liked watching the downhill, the luge (despite the tragedy which happened on opening day) and especially Ice Hockey after Canada won 8-0 today; i am still at a loss of words to explain what the hell figure skating is doing at the games. There are 4 gold medals being given at these games in figure skating competitions (including the “Ice dance” routine, they are flat out telling us that they are awarding gold medals for dancing at the Olympics).

I cannot understand how something so subjective as Figure Skating can have medals allocated to it. How is the subjective nature which is inherent to such a sport overcome while awarding the medals. A triple spin by one team is basically the same as a triple spin by a different team. The real sport equivalent of this would be a team winning a football match because they had more completed passes and stepovers and had more fluency in their movements.

This led me to research a few more sports which are in the Olympics (while cricket is still trying to be played in the year 2020) which do not deserve having medals allocated to them

1. Dressage (also known as “Horse dancing”):

Giving a gold for this “sport” is the equivalent of awarding a gold to the dancing bears in the circus. The event is basically a test to see who can make the horse dance to a pre-choreographed routine better. Why this seemed like a sport is a question which needs to be asked. If the Olympics want a sport in which the human has very little to do, there is a fixed arena and a time limit to meet, then may i humbly suggest Formula-1 (or car racing in any form), it would be a million times more exciting and may actually get people to watch the Olympics.

2. Aerobic gymnastics:

While the other forms of gymnastics may still have some merit for their inclusion in the Olympics, aerobic gymnastics doesn’t. It consists of people dancing (again) and performing a routine on a 7×7 mat. If the Olympics is concerned about the mat going to waste, they can instead introduce “Kendo” which is basically a more kick-ass version of fencing. Seriously, would you rather see a guy dance or 2 guys beat the hell out of each other.

3. Figure Skating:


I know i started the list with this one, but i hate its inclusion twice as much as the others on this list. I mean why not introduce roller skating in the summer Olympics, the principle is the exact same and the skills required are the same as well. Or i would rather prefer Roller Hockey, it is Ice Hockey’s temperamental brother.

4. Finally, and this one peeves me a lot, Synchronized swimming:

Remember when Phelps beat everyone to win a truckload of gold medals? Well, now imagine if Phelps and his relay team suddenly stopped racing and started doing pirouettes in water. That is what Synchronized swimming is, an abomination. This “sport” makes less and less sense the more i think about it. In fact, all the above put together make me wonder why Disco dancing or break dancing is not an Olympic sport yet.

This was a short list of stuff the Olympics could really do without, they serve no purpose and i am pretty sure no one would miss them if they are gone.

Until Next Time,

K.C.G

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